I've Always Been Curious

I think I drove my parents crazy with questions that usually started with one word:

Why?

Why do people do what they do?

Why do they choose certain paths?

Why do some people seem to move forward while others stay stuck?

Why can two people be given the exact same information and have completely different outcomes?

I've always had a need to understand how things work. Not just things, but people.

Looking back now, I realize there was another common thread running through my life that I didn't fully appreciate at the time. PATTERNS.

I've always been drawn to patterns. As a kid, I loved art, but I also loved math and science. Most people see those subjects as completely different. I never did. To me, they all involved patterns.

Art is about seeing relationships, balance, and connections.

Math is about understanding systems and how things fit together.

Science is about observing, testing, and finding explanations for why things happen.

In different ways, they all require you to look beyond what's immediately obvious.

I think that's why I've always been fascinated by people. I've never been particularly interested in surface-level answers. I've always wanted to understand what was happening underneath.

What influences people's decisions?

What shapes their behaviour?

Why do some people thrive in certain environments while others struggle?

Why do some people follow through while others can't seem to get started?

As I got older, that curiosity expanded into movement and the human body. I wasn't a superstar athlete growing up, but I was a successful track and field athlete in high school. After graduation, sports weren't a major focus, but fitness became part of my life. By the age of 19, I was working in gyms and helping people pursue their health goals.

What I thought would be a career in fitness became something much bigger.

Over the last 36 years, I've had the privilege of working with thousands of people.

I've watched people start.

Stop.

Start again.

Get frustrated.

Lose confidence.

Regain momentum.

And sometimes find themselves stuck in the exact same place they were months or years earlier.

I've been there myself. The longer I worked in the industry, the more I noticed something. The people who struggled weren't necessarily lacking information.

Most people know exercise is important.

Most people know nutrition matters.

Most people know they need to show up consistently if they want results.

Information wasn't usually the problem. The real challenge was figuring out how to apply that information when real life got in the way.

• Stress.

• Family responsibilities.

• Work demands.

• Health issues.

• Limited time.

• Changing priorities.

• Low confidence.

• Competing goals.

Life is rarely simple, yet most solutions are presented as if it is. What I began noticing were patterns.

Patterns in the people who succeeded.

Patterns in the people who struggled.

Patterns in the barriers that kept showing up over and over again.

Patterns in the systems people were trying to navigate.

Patterns in the advice they were receiving.

Patterns in how they responded when things didn't go according to plan.

I also started noticing these patterns beyond health and fitness. In organizations, I often saw talented people whose strengths weren't being fully utilized. I saw teams working hard but struggling because expectations weren't clear, communication broke down, or people weren't given the support they needed to succeed.

Time and time again, I noticed that performance wasn't simply about skill or effort. It was often influenced by the systems people were working within. When communication is unclear, priorities constantly shift, or people don't understand how their work connects to a larger goal, even highly capable individuals can struggle.

Just as people don't succeed or fail in isolation, neither do teams. This reinforced something I was already seeing in health and behaviour: outcomes are rarely the result of a single factor. They're usually the result of multiple influences interacting with one another.

The more I paid attention, the more I realized that behaviour is rarely about one thing.

It's almost always about context. It's about understanding the environment people are operating in, the challenges they're facing, the beliefs they're carrying, their current capacity, and the systems surrounding them. That's why I've never been comfortable with simple answers.

Human beings aren't simple.

Life isn't simple.

And meaningful change certainly isn't simple.

We've been conditioned to believe that success comes from discipline, willpower, or finding the perfect plan. We're taught that we should be able to pick a goal, work hard, and stay on track no matter what. When we can't, we often blame ourselves. But after decades of observing people, I've come to a different conclusion.

Most people aren't failing because they're lazy.

Most people aren't failing because they're broken.

Most people aren't failing because they don't care enough.

They're trying to navigate increasingly complex lives while carrying barriers they may not even recognize. The problem isn't a lack of information. The problem is learning how to apply information in a way that fits real life.

In the health and fitness world, social media has made this even harder. We're constantly being shown images of perfection.

Perfect bodies.

Perfect routines.

Perfect morning habits.

Perfect discipline.

As a former fitness competitor, I can tell you that health and appearance are not the same thing. Getting extremely lean requires discipline. But so does living in what I call the colourful middle.

The colourful middle is where most of life happens.

• It's where you learn to be consistent without needing to be perfect.

• It's where you adapt when life changes.

• It's where you learn that progress isn't a straight line.

• It's where you stop chasing extremes and start building something sustainable.

Over time, all of these experiences led me to where I am today.

A Behavioural Systems Strategist.

Not because I was looking for a title. But because it best describes what I've been doing all along. Looking for patterns. Looking between the lines.

Trying to understand not just what people do, but why they do it. Trying to understand not just the person, but the system they're operating within. Because information alone isn't enough.

Real change requires;

• Self-awareness.

• Patience.

• Adaptability.

• Understanding.

It requires knowing when to push and when to pull back. When to build. When to pause.

When to let go of something that isn't working and strengthen what is.

I often think about it like a piece of plastic. Cold plastic snaps under pressure. Apply the right amount of heat and it becomes flexible. It bends. It adapts. It reshapes. Too much heat and it melts. Too little and it breaks.

People aren't that different. Lasting change happens when we find the right amount of challenge for where we are right now. Not where we wish we were. Not where someone else thinks we should be. But where we actually are.

Consistency isn't doing the exact same thing every day. Consistency is continuing to show up, even when what showing up looks like changes.

Looking back now, I can see that the common thread was never fitness.

• It wasn't nutrition.

• It wasn't coaching.

• It wasn't even behaviour.

• It was curiosity.

A curiosity about people.

A curiosity about patterns.

A curiosity about why some people move forward while others stay stuck.

That curiosity is what brought me here.

The next question is why I care so deeply about helping people navigate those patterns in their own lives.

That's a story for the next blog.

Thanks for reading,

Carmen